Shmuck, Party of One

The gauntlet has been thrown. No, I'm not referring to the impending UCLA-USC football game, but to words that were spoken by my wife to me last night (a Friday night!) at 8pm. For those of you that don't know, I have been experiencing medical problems ever since we returned from a family trip to Hawaii in January 2006. I have had three extensive stays in the hospital along with over a dozen trips to the ER. All they have left me with is a few misdiagnoses and an occassional opiate addiction. Wonderful! Add to this the numerous doctors that I've seen over that period of time and I've been labeled/diagnosed with pancreatitis, ulcerative colitis, maybe Crohn's Disease, and countless parasites and fungi. Needless to say it hasn't been a pleasant experience (not counting my wedding, honeymoon, and the birth of my beautiful daughter). So last night my wife (refer to the blog I aptly titled "A hot trainer I found") challenged me to get back into shape. I'm assuming by "get back" she was referring to my sixteen year-old athletic, svelte self. The person that she remembers from summer camp many years ago. Ahhh, the good old days.

Well, what do I do? I watch her day-after-day kick the shit out of every client (in a loving, helpful, supportive way) that comes to her. And they have the luxury of leaving after an hour. I, however, am with her everyday (a very, very lucky man) and not only get the trainer side, but the nutrionist side at every meal. The hamster in my head is definitely working overtime on that wheel at the moment...

She has told me that for 12-16 weeks I will be working out (mostly with kettlebells) for 20-30 minutes five times a week and experiencing a much healthier diet. Seems like a lot to ask a man who thrives on giving into ice creamy temptations. So here I am, baring myself to the public, and asking for sound advice. What would you do? But more importantly, what should I do? The forum is now open and stay tuned for the exciting developments...


By the way, my wife is an amazing personal trainer and nutristionist and I know for sure that any of her dozens of clients would attest to that without hesitation.

Should It Be A Mystery?

This is only my third day, but I'm quickly beginning to understand that nobody truly reads these things. Oh well, that's not going to stop me. Today I'm going to turn my attention to the literary world. During my junior high and high school days, I was a huge fan of mystery and horror novels. I read every Stephen King book that I could get my hands on and raced through the works of Elmore Leonard, Richard Price, Stephen Hunter, etc. My passion for this genre disappeared for awhile until a good friend of mine in graduate school (a sweet, young man from somewhere in Maine) recommended a book titled King Suckerman by George Pelecanos. I remember thoroughly enjoying reading this book during an especially harsh Boston winter. Unfortunately, I can't tell you too much about the book today, but it did entice me to then read The Big Blowdown, which I also enjoyed.

Fast forward to years later and I'm browsing through a used bookstore in Encinitas and I come upon another Pelecanos book. I have been slightly following his career and am a huge fan of The Wire. This book, titled Shoedog, was a fun read. It reminded me why I liked reading this genre in the first place. Pelecanos is great with describing his seedy characters and always makes me feel like the action is taking place all around me. Shoedog reminded me of Sunset Boulevard (one of my favorite films) through its flashback narration where you almost know the ending at the beginning, but still stick around for all the twists and turns. Now I find myself searching for more Pelecanos material.

Unfortuantely, I rode the wave a little too long and picked up another of the hard boiled crime genre at this wonderful little bookstore. I wondered what it would be like to test one of the new releases from Stephen King. The Colorado Kid is a little paperback that was obviously written for a specific publisher and probably pumped out on a computer in mere days. I think Stephen King has passed his prime (something tells me that I'm not the only person in that camp). He should've retired after his blockbusters: Pet Semetary, The Dead Zone, Thinner, Misery and his wonderful book of short stories that included The Body and Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption. I guess not everyone can walk away from their careers at their apex (except Michael Jordan of the Chicago White Sox). I digress.

For those of you that truly enjoy well written, graphically violent books than I highly recommend an Italian author named Massimo Carlotto. Only a few of his books have been translated into English and the one that I read is titled Death's Dark Abyss. It is quite unnerving at times, but if you have the stomach for that type of thing than this is for you.

I would like to end this blog back at the beginning. I mentioned my good friend from Maine and today is the perfect day to do so. I would like to pass along an extremely heartfelt Happy Birthday to my two sisters living under his roof. I miss them terribly and only hope that they still remember me. And on a similar note, I would like to wish a Happy Birthday to my Papa. I would also like him to know that I'm sending him a lifetime supply of Playboys and a big screen TV so we can watch all the games together when I get there. September 20th is a very important day!

Let's Not Get Caryed Away

Yes, I may be a nobody, but I can be just as cheesy as a somebody. The title refers to a comment left by one of my die hard fans (if one can have such fans after their first day in the blog world). She is apparently infatuated with Cary Grant and wants to marry him in the past. Even though it is not January 18th (the day Cary was born), I will oblige with some of my thoughts.

First off, I will admit that up until a few months ago I was not a Cary Grant fan. I definitely understood why women were attracted to him, but was a bit lost as to his acting abilities. I, of course, enjoyed To Catch a Thief (1955) and North by Northwest (1959), but everyone knows that the greatness of Hitchcock's films has little to do with the actors talents. The more popular films (in their day) of Mr. Grant did not tickle my funny bone and therefore I found no reason to invest any more of my time in his career. I am referring to such films as Bringing Up Baby (1938), His Girl Friday (1940) and Arsenic and Old Lace (1944) just to name a few. Recently, however, thanks to the wonders of Turner Classic Movies and DVR I have been given the opportunity to watch more Cary Grant films at my convenience at no cost (I choose to forget about the large cable bill that deducts from my bank account every month). My television graciously recorded My Favorite Wife (1940) and That Touch of Mink (1962) and kept it for me until I had sufficient time to watch them. My Favorite Wife was enjoyable due to the comedic concept and the love triangle that exists between Cary, Randolph Scott and Irene Dunne. I finally saw the comedic timing that Cary possessed (maybe I was just too immature to appreciate it before). I wont divulge too much about the movie because I recommend seeing it. The other film, That Touch of Mink, was less enjoyable (in most roles Doris Day annoys me) due to his female counterpart, but Cary was excellent. His portrayal of an extravagantly wealthy business man was likeable and quite fun to identify with. Unfortunately, this was one of Cary's last films, but for me there are many more to see.

I encourage my readers to throw some Cary Grant recommendations at me because I am always open to seeing movies. As for the aforementioned die hard fan, Cary Grant had five wives and apparently shared a house with Randolph Scott which drummed up lots of publicity and questions. I will conclude this entry with a trivia question (I assume that those who answer will do so from their own knowledge bank and not search the internet beforehand): Who is the mother of Cary's only child? A daughter named Jennifer Grant...

In the beginning...

This blog started out as a way for me to experiment with a book idea that has been ruminating in my brain for months (having something in your brain for that long can sometimes cause headaches and just general discomfort). The basic idea of the book was to have each day of the year on its own page and have that day represented by an actor or actress who was born on that day (sorry for such a redundant sentence that kept repeating itself). Then I would pick my favorite performance of said actor and actress in a movie and write a short review of that film. The idea of the book transformed itself into a possible day-to-day throw away calendar (Far Side style). So at times I will be using this blog as research for my book/calendar. I have written this in the public doman and therefore I have sole copyrights. I am, however, multi-faceted.

I began by titling my blog "Movie Nerd," but then I realized that just writing about my movie obsession might become boring (to others and myself) at times. So I hereby pledge to rant and rave about other things as well. Please feel free to pass along suggestions if there's a particular subject on which you would like my opinion. I have a feeling most of posts will center around movies, sports, books and my life.

For those of you that truly consider me to be an anonymous nobody allow me to explain. I currently live in Encinitas (north San Diego) with my wife and daughter. There will probably be some ramblings about the experiences of fatherhood since it's new to me (Lyla is five days away from turning 8 months). I am an unemployed teacher that spends his afternoons hoping to get a call from a computer offering me a substitute position for the next day. I finished my teacher credential program at the end of the last school year and quickly found that getting a job in this area is as impossible as keeping my daughter on a consistent schedule (or doing the subtitling for a Sylvester Stallone movie). Anyway, I have said my piece so I will leave off with, to be continued...